Write Some Six-Word Car Horror Stories!!!

"Wheelerguy" (wheelerguy) 05/11/2015 at 12:02 • Filed to: Six-Word Car Stories

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!!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! (two and four wheels), road trips gone worse than Top Gear Specials, or even a Predator story starring Lexus circa 2015. i09 made the signal; now is our turn. Rule stays the same: only six words.

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And in particular, my turn.

Leading until Maldonado rear-ended me.

Alright! Your turn!

WesBarton89 - The Way to Santa Fe > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:05

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Got the last car available: Camry.

71MGBGT Likes Subarus of Unusual Colors > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:06

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Welded all differentials for maximum drift

nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:07

8

Changed the oil. Chocolate milkshake. Shit.

Dwhite - Powered by Caffeine, Daft Punk, and Corgis > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:08

5

Why would you want a car?

71MGBGT Likes Subarus of Unusual Colors > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:08

2

Got diesel in my gasoline again.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:09

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I rode in a Camry. Once.

BiTurbo228 - Dr Frankenstein of Spitfires > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:11

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Well, we’ve got Yugos...or Yugos

this is not matt farah's foxbodymiata > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:11

5

Slicks in the rain... hit boost.

Your boy, BJR > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:13

3

My dickhole got fingered while driving.

Wheelerguy > Dwhite - Powered by Caffeine, Daft Punk, and Corgis 05/11/2015 at 12:15

2

Well, because fuck you, at least.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:16

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Wheel came off on the highway.

CB > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:17

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Found it: the last manual Miata.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:17

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Two lane road; prius in front.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:19

2

Drain plug missing on differential case.

OK, that's all I got.

thebigbossyboss > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:19

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Deer fell off overpass onto windshield.

Xyl0c41n3 > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:20

2

Car in shop, loaner blew plug.

Also:

Blow-out in BFE, spare blew, too.

(And yes, hyphenating “blow-out” makes it one word... because I said so. ^_~)

thebigbossyboss > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:21

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Cleaved deer with motorcycle. Bloody mess.

71MGBGT Likes Subarus of Unusual Colors > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:21

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Cop at end of onramp: fuuuuuuuuuuck

CB > thebigbossyboss 05/11/2015 at 12:24

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I get that reference.

Party-vi > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:24

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2016 Miata Transmission Options:

CVT

Automatic

StoneCold > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:24

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That needs to be special ordered.

CB > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:24

4

School zone. Brakes failed. Sorry, kids.

Sam > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:25

2

Oh shit, you told him, son.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:26

1

Winston won. He loved Big Prius.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:27

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Row upon row... no steering wheels.

Funktheduck > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:30

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Heavy Atlanta traffic. Dog poop everywhere

LongbowMkII > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:30

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Bought a S600. No warranty available.

deekster_caddy > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:39

2

Friend’s Audi needs a timing belt.

(not my pic, found on GIS)

Vicente Esteve > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:41

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Why Drive? Let’s Take The Autonomobile.

Wheelerguy > Vicente Esteve 05/11/2015 at 12:43

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Alright I seriously don’t get this.

DeWayneV8 > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:44

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Finished building V8, V8 gets stolen.

Wheelerguy > DeWayneV8 05/11/2015 at 12:46

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V8 gets stolen, V8 blows up.

Wheelerguy > CB 05/11/2015 at 12:47

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Maybe that “Shame on You” ad isn’t so bad after all?

Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:48

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GTI wiring harness meltdown yet again.

Fifth to first downshift - oh shit

Car for free will cost you

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > LongbowMkII 05/11/2015 at 12:49

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Took me a minute because Honda.

Wobbles the Mind > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:50

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Porsche to end production of 911

Tesla systems have become self aware.

Chevy Trax is the new answer.

Vicente Esteve > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:51

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Typo! only “no” was needed for it to make sense.

Wheelerguy > Wobbles the Mind 05/11/2015 at 12:52

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By the time the Chevy Trax is the answer, the Miata has ceased production, Jalopnik is dead and another site is born.

But seriously, though, that 911 story.

LongbowMkII > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 05/11/2015 at 12:52

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Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 12:53

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Bad ground fried blower and relay.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > Xyl0c41n3 05/11/2015 at 12:56

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Blowout makes it by my spellcheck without hyphens, so it’s totally one word. However, spellcheck isn’t(!?)

Sethersm > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 13:01

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Has interference engine, broken timing belt.

themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 13:03

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Turned the wrench. Bolt stayed still.

Last I remember, was a “clunk”.

I turned left. I stayed straight.

For sale- Harbor freight jack stands.

themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 13:04

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Engine dropped. Friend screamed. I couldn't

Svart Smart, traded in his Smart > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 13:05

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Waited until green light before signaling.

Wheelerguy > themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles 05/11/2015 at 13:06

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This has Final Destination written all over it.

Wheelerguy > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 13:06

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Any race car horror stories?

themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 13:09

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You all needed to up your horror game. These are just “Automotive inconvenience and/or troubleshooting” stories. True horror?

“Brake pedal sank to the floor”

Xyl0c41n3 > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 05/11/2015 at 13:09

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I love that my spellcheck now accepts “mazderp” as a word. ^_^ And “opponauts.”

Wheelerguy > themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles 05/11/2015 at 13:12

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Nasty.

How about race car horror?

thebigbossyboss > Svart Smart, traded in his Smart 05/11/2015 at 13:13

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THIS!!! OMG.

themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 13:23

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Searched for apex. Found the wall

Heard a noise. Saw the sky.

I watched the replay in hospital

Driver left pits. Wheel nut didnt.

Workers found him, besides the head

White flags waiving. Fuel light blinking.

My car, and dreams, were finished

I tried to go. Car didn't.

Wheelerguy > themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles 05/11/2015 at 13:24

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You. You’re gonna see some good times tomorrow.

themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 13:26

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I made another comment here with some good ones.

As Du Volant > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 13:31

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Replaced transmission Sunday, blew engine Thursday.

True story. It sucked.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > Xyl0c41n3 05/11/2015 at 13:31

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I wonder if there’s an equivalent of Stockholm Syndrome as pertaining to a cybernetic entity. Or gaslighting. I think your spellcheck *may* be subject to both.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles 05/11/2015 at 13:33

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Harbor Freight jack stands - slightly bent.

Wheelerguy > As Du Volant 05/11/2015 at 13:35

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You have a spot come tomorrow.

Still waiting to be FP’d, though.

themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 13:43

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I grabbed fourth, but found second

TheRealBicycleBuck > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 13:44

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Road trip! Carburetor fire.... Towed home.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > LongbowMkII 05/11/2015 at 13:52

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I like the Honda one better.

LongbowMkII > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 05/11/2015 at 13:55

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Couldn’t blame you, but this is a horror story (mercedes break down) not a charming anecdote (sports car break down)

KusabiSensei - Captain of the Toronto Maple Leafs > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 13:56

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Bought a car from the dealer.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > LongbowMkII 05/11/2015 at 13:56

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Bought S600. It is a Mercedes.

Xyl0c41n3 > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 05/11/2015 at 14:08

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Maybe. Because this blasted thing always autocorrects correctly spelled words at the most inopportune time and in ways that are often embarrassing. So, my phone is definitely getting some passive aggressive revenge, for sure. Lol.

LongbowMkII > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 05/11/2015 at 14:10

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Honda S600 broke down. Carried it.

CaptDale - is secretly British > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 14:35

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Employee, car in shop 3 months.

Distraxi's idea of perfection is a Jagroen > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 15:26

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Flat left over crest - no, right!

Straight is ending, but no brakes

This one will only work for people from my town: Wingers serviced my Legacy: enough said.

DeWayneV8 > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 16:11

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Somebody out there is shifting my awesome small block at 7 grand destroying tires. I hope they die a horrible, slow death for stealing my engine. They just took the engine!

Tapas > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 16:20

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Fire at Peterson Museum, classics destroyed.

Whooo doing sixty tw...cliff ahead?!

Tapas > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 16:27

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This is a bit personal to me, because I’m trying to stay in the US.

“We’re moving you to Singapore now.”

Singapore taxes the living crap out of car owners. Overall cost of buying a car in Singapore is:

Registration fee + Cost Price + Road Tax + COE + additional registration fee (140% of OMV) and customs duty (31% of OMV).

A Prius would cost close to US $95k

http://www.expatsingapore.com/content/view/1…

Manic Otti > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 17:41

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I picked up the breaker bar.

Manic Otti > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 17:43

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I was tightening the tiny carburetor screw.

AdverseMartyr > thebigbossyboss 05/11/2015 at 19:37

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Are you my brother-in-law? He did that a few years ago on his Harley.

AdverseMartyr > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 19:38

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Could not find Camry; bought Accord.

thebigbossyboss > AdverseMartyr 05/11/2015 at 19:48

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That depends. Is your wife’s sister hot? If so then I’ll aspire to it.

Nah. Someone here did that last week. Severed the deer into two halves. Gross.

Wheelerguy > Tapas 05/11/2015 at 22:56

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Oh snap.

I suggest you defect to The Philippines. Runs cheaper than Singapore and is relatively quiet if you live in the provinces. Also, you get mad kudos from the locals.

StoneCold > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 05/11/2015 at 23:06

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Harbor Freight jack stands on clearance.

Tapas > Wheelerguy 05/11/2015 at 23:53

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Unfortunately, I wouldn't have a say in where my company places me, if I get kicked out of the US. So yea...